Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Moon of Territory
I was reading a book this week which is set in the early 1920’s. What I liked about the story is that after a while I could see the men tip their hats to the women as they crossed their path; or give their seats; or open doors etc… Chivalry was practically stepping off the page. I noticed that the women in the book were appreciative, polite and somewhat flirtatious. They kept their heads down and spoke with their eyes. The way they hide behind their hats and tucked their hair close to the nape translated timidity, femininity, and prudishness. I found myself almost feeling great loss when I realized that men and women didn’t play these games anymore of bowing, dancing, and seeking each other out.
“Where did it all go and why?” I found myself asking my husband one evening before bed.
“Women wanted to be equal to men,” he replied as if the answer was so obvious. Still after a few moments of silence even my husband started to speak as if he also missed these old customs.
“I always walk to the back of an elevator so that women who step in can exit first,” he explained, “but I notice that lots of young men don’t even bother with that kind of thing anymore.”
This month (full moon of June to full moon of July) is about the Moon of Territory. Last year we were looking a territory from a point of view of death but this year, it’s about presence and boundaries. Have we lost our sense of female and male territory in the 21st century? It’s definitely been a big question for me this month. Is it important for us to have male and female territory?
In Golden, at our last workshop we had lots of couples. It’s a rare occurrence at our workshops. Usually we have lots more women and a few, young, single men. I found it uncanny and definitely synchronic that this workshop called to long term couple relationships right under the watchful eye of the Moon of Territory. I remember walking down the path that lead to one of the cabins one night and whispering to the Moon almost teasingly: “What are you planning?” Once you can read the cosmological and natural themes you fall in constant discussions with the cosmos. The themes may be obvious but the teachings are always unexpected and incredibly satisfying.
Jealousy, love, trust, possessiveness, commitment, loyalty and clear communication were definitely some of the topics that were explored during the week. What I found wonderful was the way that the men and the women defined their boundaries and showed that there was indeed male and female territories.
“This is the way we think. This is the way we feel. This is the way we express ourselves…” seemed to be constantly repeated during the workshop. It seemed important to define, describes and explore the female and male territories. We discovered the territories together (men and women).
Unlike the traditions of the past you couldn’t pin point with behaviours and attitudes where the feminine and the masculine started and ended; and yet you felt it. It took work to value each other and I think one thing we all realized is that it was well worth our time and effort. In the end, it created an intimacy that translated itself into tribe. It was an unexpected surprise.