Monday, January 9, 2012

Moon of Welcome

Full Moon. This weekend we celebrated the Moon of Welcome. You would think it would be the kind of Moon that is uplifting, filled with smiles and great intentions; but this year the vibe at our circle was somewhat morose. Many of the stories, that were shared were about death and the miserable feeling that’s attached to growing older. Strangely enough most of the women in our circle are in their early 30’s. It’s amazing how every year the Moon of Welcome offers a different facet attached to the theme of “welcoming.” For example this year, there’s no doubt the Moon of Welcome is asking us to explore the idea of “welcoming death.”

None of us made any association to 2012. It was more about connecting to the moment and to the synchronicities. IL talked about some of the discussions; which occurred in her family between Christmas and New Year. She mentioned how many of the elders in her family were more expressive of their fears relating to death because one by one they were slowly and inevitably passing away. It brought me back to a moment in my life when I saw my father vulnerable for the first time because two of his best friends unexpectedly passed away in their mid-50’s. He was visibly afraid and brought his whole life in question. For my father it didn’t seem to be about fearing “his own demise” but more so about fearing “the passing of his loved ones.” Abruptly enough the loss of his friends triggered a retreat from life and from relationships. He expected his heart to be broken by death, and this new concept horrified him.

This morning when I took the dogs out for a walk I mentioned to GP how much we could learn from observing our pets and their sensual understanding of life. My two Beagles never feel alone. Each time they come across the urine of another dog, they are totally enlightened by the story of this other animal as if the urine alone allows them to be in touch with others. Humans seem to need so much more to feel connected. We don’t depend or trust our senses, our intuition, our instinct or our vibe of the World around us…

Humans need touch or physical presence.

When I was a child growing up with the ability to see and hear Spirit many of the adults in my life nourished my inner doubt rather than my inner knowing. I remember feeling angry a lot as if something inside told me “it was wrong to mistrust my personal experience.” Today, I look at young people who are awakening to Spirit and I see no difference between the way they are treated by society and adults to the way I was treated. I often wonder how “so little we change” from generation to generation.

Shouldn’t we learn from our ancestors? And shouldn’t we grow in sacred knowledge and wisdom?

On our Facebook group, the Medicine Wheel and Indigenous Dreaming, a discussion was started on the topic of grieving. CC told a story about a woman who shared the photo of her stillborn child on internet. According to the details the picture triggered a kind of controversy. Should we be allowed to share such gruesome images of our private loss? Where CC related the story to something she experienced in her own life and admired the woman for having the courage to express her grieving; others on internet wondered about the dangers of sensationalism. Perspective can always bring up a debate or a conflict. On our site the discussion brought up the importance of mourning.

At the Moonlodge this weekend, LG one of our circle elders shared her personal story about how she was given the same name as one of her older sisters who passed away at the age of 3 years old. LG explained how she felt she didn’t exist for the first 3 years of her life. Her mother especially kept her distance as if she expected all of her babies to die at the age of 3. Even once LG survived the death sentence her mother thought her sister had left behind, she felt no deep connection with her family.

“I called my best friend’s parents mom and dad,” LG explained, “and felt like I belonged more in her family than in my own.”

Between the birth of my son and the birth of my daughter I had a miscarriage. It wasn’t much of an issue for me because I was in close contact with the souls of my children before they were born. I knew that if KT didn’t make it the first time around, she would try and try again until she would incarnate. In other words, the miscarriage wasn’t about a loss or a death for me, it was about my body struggling through form and about me doing my best to give my daughter the opportunity to be born. One way or another I knew without a shred of a doubt she would be born…

What is special about this story is how KT knew as early on as 3 years old that “she had died and come back to us.” She literally had the memory of the experience; which has always been totally incredible to me. You can’t help but trust your belief system when it’s confirmed empirically along the way. Having been taught to doubt for the better half of my life -- trusting always takes a bit of work for me. I remember how at least six years of my journey was dedicated to reaching beyond the “doubting Thomas syndrome” (as I called it). Often KT and CT impressed us (my husband and I) with knowledge that literally came from the realm of the unknown. How did our daughter know about this story if we never told her about it? I’ve asked myself this question countless times relating to countless contexts in the last 35 years. Just yesterday, KT and her boyfriend, AE were over for supper and we ended up discussing the topic of “beliefs.”

“Do you believe in reincarnation?” I asked AE.
“NO!” he responded categorically as if it wasn’t even something to ponder.

AE glanced over to KT and with a shy smile murmured the question: “Do you?”
“It’s not about believing for me,” KT replied, “it’s a fact. I remember and the people around me remember too. How can you possibly say that a fork isn’t a fork when you’ve been using it for as long as you can remember?”

Sometimes I wonder who are the elders in our house.

There’s no doubt that perspective plays an important part in the way we live life. If we believe in loss then, there’s no doubt we’ll need to mourn loss and eventually survive it. Tonight as I look up at the Full Moon I call on my inner Wolf / Beagle / or Canine and welcome the attitude of never feeling alone or never feeling overwhelmed by loss. It’s possible to remember through our senses and to trigger experiences; which allow us to truly be ONE. If there’s anything that I’m grieving tonight it’s the collective loss of sacred knowledge.

It would great if on this Moon of Welcome we chose to “embrace life” as a continuous ribbon of never ending stories. There are so many different ways to perceive the notion of “welcoming death.” From a Medicine Wheel perspective I’d like to suggest – “to welcome an end to doubt, to disempowerment and to anything and everything that robs us of memory, medicine, and spirit.” Welcoming death may surprise you with a journey unlike anything you’ve ever experienced.


P.S. The picture was taken in our back yard. One morning the ice in our back yard showed a constellation of stars. It looked like a picture of the galaxy. Cool.

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

Lisa, I agree that humans really seem to need physical connection. I have always felt the need to physically connection, at least every once in a while. And yet I have also discovered, over the years I have been working with you and our community, that there is a connection that goes beyond that physical presence. It is a very deep, almost soul connection and knowing it and feeling it brings me contentment. I KNOW I am always connected to the people I love, the Earth that I love, and all the life around me. It is a wonderful feeling! Crowtalker

Lili said...

Not sure if two posts shall show up now...I posted one and I can't see it....I wanted to say I welcome your suggestion Lisa,

“to welcome an end to doubt, to disempowerment and to anything and everything that robs us of memory, medicine, and spirit.”

I enjoy listening to those things that you share in the moonlodge too. Thank You.

LOVE
Leanne

Michelle said...

Loved this Blog the Moon of Welcome has definitely shown me about welcoming death...death of old ways of thinking and feeling...Welcoming a more solid grounded understanding of what I do want in my life on a day to day basis. I saw at the Moon Lodge that touch was needed for healing and that there are many things that we are surviving. Definitely see the theme that this moon is bringing.

Rose said...

I have so many thoughts on this moon but I just can't seem to get started! For me, so far, it seems to be all about illness... Love your post as always. Think it is so amazing that KT remembers. Maybe she remembers because she has no negative feelings towards death?

Lisa F. Tardiff said...

Rose,

It's definitely a good theory...

Thank you again for your great comments.

LISA

Anonymous said...

This moon I am so aware of my journey that I am currently on. It keeps coming up and I wonder how to share it. your blog touched my story from many different perspectives. Thank you Lisa.
I cant share my hole journey right here but I did want to say that I have chosen to embark upon this journey and to not let fear of death rob me of the medicine that this journey has to share. I believe this fear to be connected to a past life, something I have brought in with me and am being asked to work through. Thank you once again Lisa, your blog brought tears to my eyes and gave me a surge of hope and courage.
Serena

taranova said...

It's fascinating how some people remember things... and why some continue to do so & others lose the ability. It doesn't always follow according to the attitudes around them either does it? Though it must help no end to be in a family that encourages.

I can't remember ever thinking death was the end... even before i had heard of reincarnation... it was always a case of just not seeing them for a while!

Inghinn said...

I just read your blog for the first time after Taranova had posted a link to it and reading the moon of welcome entry was one of those moments that made me wonder how anyone could possibly doubt the concept of synchronicity. My Dad passed away a week ago, it wasn't unexpected but happened much more quickly than we had thought - and amazingly enough, my 2yo nephew had told my Mum just a few weeks ago that this would happen. I believed him, but nobody else did, or didn't want to I should say. Thank you Lisa, for putting so many of my thoughts into words. Maybe humans don't always need touch or physical presence to connect, sometimes words on a screen are enough.

Blessings,
Inghinn

Lisa F. Tardiff said...

Inghinn,

Loved your comment.
I'm sorry to hear about your father's quick departure but I can assure you --- HE's OK wherever he is!!!
Even HAPPY!
Still loss is loss and I keep you and him -- in my prayers.

LISA

Erin said...

Wonderful Post!