Recently a student of mine shared a story about a friend of hers who often uses her shoulders to cry on. CH described this person as the typical individual who goes out to party, meets the perfect man and falls instantly in love only to uncover soon after that the man is married. Still many of these women believe they can change their man: Help him, and maybe HEAL him. Of course, more often than not, three to four months down the line these individuals come knocking at the door in tears, heart broken and completely oblivious to what went wrong. I’ve had people come to me asking for psychic cleansing or soul retrieval because they reasoned out that their repetitive, dysfunctional behaviours or obsessions with older often married men were due to past life karmas, evil spirits or a some kind of jinx.
It’s difficult to talk reason with these women because there’s something in their experience that seems to support the thought “that they can make a difference” and that “they are destined to save a man.” Often these ladies will speak about their mothers and grand-mothers surviving similar stories. At times it feels like these women are carrying the burdens of the women in their past.
When speaking about the topic of Ghost Whispering lots of people imagine the kind of scenarios we see on television. They imagine Ghost Whisperers as people who can see the dead and communicate to them. More often than not people who are curious or interested in the topic of death and ghosts come from a perspective of fear:
· What happens when I die?
· Can I become a ghost? What makes a ghost? And how can I help my loved ones pass over?
· Or – are these ghosts haunting me and how much of their unresolved realities in impacting my life, my choices, and reality?
· Or - is there such a thing as heaven? Can it be possible that we are all doomed to wander after life?
I’ve come to understand the role of the Ghost Whisperer as more of a relationship expert than an expert on death. There’s no doubt that the GW can see or hear ghosts and communicate with them; but their work is mostly done in guiding each person involved in the story of unresolved. A GW gives direction, finds and shares the missing details within the story, and brings forth new perspective. A GW helps people dead and alive to come together with presence and awareness. In other words, a GH helps people transcend time and space. It’s not about death or life – it’s about realizing that it’s never too late to learn, to listen, to understand, and to let go. Where some people imagine heaven as a place somewhere out there far from the Earth, I like to experience it through short moments when all is clear and all has meaning.
Dealing with ghosts doesn’t only mean dealing with the decease who’s struggling to cross over. If you are harbouring unresolved towards old spouses, parents or an ex-boss – you are dealing with ghosts. Your thoughts and attitudes can create ghosts that are as real and as haunting as any human ghost out there. If you are carrying secrets or memories that are impacting your life in a negative way – these too are ghosts. If you are living your life according to the expectations of others or because of the stories of others – these too are ghosts.
Some Ghost Whisperers can even interact with ghosts that are attached to lockets, old records, and as shadows to humans etc... Even though these ghosts are not humans who never made it to the after life, they are still memories or thoughts that are floating around us asking to be resolved. We are impacted by what exists in our environment and in the air we breath. Oxygen and Carbon Dioxide does float in the air we inhale. Positive and negative ions are part of us and part of everything alive. A good GW is not meant to resolve the story of every ghost out there; but also to show and to teach those who come for help – that they are in part responsible for the ghosts that are haunting them and that they can make a difference.
I think it’s a great idea to sit down with the people who come to us for help and show them that they can make a difference just by changing an attitude, or making new choices, or letting go of harmful behaviours. Believe it or not in this conversation we are ghost whispering. I think it all starts by becoming aware of our personal ghosts and resolving them. Once we’ve taken responsibility for what is ours and worked with it – we can start looking towards helping others.
P.S. This picture was taken this summer. I was actually able to capture 3 ghosts on this picture. See if you can see them.